This week's topic is
Top Ten Books I'll Never Read:
10.
The Second Short Life of Bree Tanner by Stephenie Meyer - Seriously... Doesn't she have enough of our money yet?
9.
The Chronicles of Narnia by C. S. Lewis - I read the first two books when I was younger, but I couldn't get into the rest of them. And, quite frankly, finding out that they were Christian allegory made me feel like I'd been tricked. I have no desire to read the rest of the books now.
8.
The Lord of the Rings by J. R. R. Tolkien - I tried to read the first one, but it was
so boring. Even the movie seemed too long and dull. They may be classics, but I just can't get into them. I did enjoy
The Hobbit, though.
7.
anything self-published, even if it has a 5-star rating on Amazon - Been there, done that, wanted to gouge my eyes out and bash my head against the wall. After my experience with
Basajaun, I've developed a phobia of self-published novels. (Okay, never say never. I might one day read another self-published novel. But I need to first figure out how tell what's good and what isn't. The star ratings certainly don't help!)
6.
Joseph Andrews by Henry Fielding - This was required reading in university. Worst book ever! Seriously. I couldn't get past the first 20 pages. I was, quite literally, bored to tears. I used Coles Notes to write my essay and pass the course. I have no desire to
ever pick this up and read the whole thing.
5.
anything by Ernest Hemingway - He's overrated, in my opinion. I had to read
The Sun Also Rises in high school. I hated it. My mom had to read
The Old Man and the Sea. She hated it. Maybe we have some sort of anti-Hemingway gene...
4.
anything by Shannon Hale - Her books may be good; I don't know. But I found her attitude toward people who didn't enjoy
Breaking Dawn to be condescending and rude. It's one thing to stick up for a fellow author... but you shouldn't insult intelligent readers when you do so.
3.
Emma by Jane Austen - I've tried to read this book, but I just can't get into it. It's probably my least favourite of the Austen stories. I don't mind the movie versions (the newest one produced by the BBC was really good), but I don't think I'll ever actually read the book.
2.
Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë - I just don't understand the appeal. I tried to read this book twice, and gave up both times. I've seen the movie, so I know I'm not missing much except creepy family dynamics and dysfunctional romantic relationships. No wonder this is Bella and Edward's favourite book.
1.
The Da Vinci Code - I've got it sitting on my bookshelf, mostly unread. It seemed like they were never going to escape from the Louvre. So I quit. When you want to yell at a book, "Get on with it, already!" you know it's time to give up.