Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Top Ten Tuesday - Biggest Jerks in Literature

Top Ten Tuesday is hosted at The Broke and the Bookish.

This week's topic is Top Ten Biggest Jerks in Literature:

10. Gale from Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins - Don't get me wrong: I really liked Gale in the first two books, and I really wanted to see him get together with Katniss.  Not only did he not do that, he went off and did stuff that seemed totally out of character.  I was disappointed, to say the least.
9. Draco from the Harry Potter series by J. K. Rowling - Everybody loves a good racist.  Well, in literature, anyway.  I'm torn between Draco and his father... but since Draco was the one who made life really miserable for Harry, he gets to make the list.
8. Patch from Hush, Hush by Becca Fitzpatrick - He's a big jerk, which makes for a fun character to read about... but really bad boyfriend material.
7. Edward from Eclipse by Stephenie Meyer - He was creepy in all the other books, but he was quite appalling in this one.  He came across as a controlling, emotionally abusive boyfriend.  It's not enough to just warn his girlfriend away from her friends... he has to physically tamper with her truck's engine to ensure she doesn't go anywhere!
6. Jacob from Eclipse by Stephenie Meyer - I thought Jacob was sort of a sweet kid up until this book.  Then he sexually assaults Bella and has a laugh about it with her father.  (Seriously... his daughter's just been kissed against her will -- and nearly broken her hand fighting the guy off -- and all Charlie can do is laugh?  And he's the police chief?!  Maybe I should've put Charlie on the list instead...)
5. Damon from The Vampire Diaries: The Awakening by L. J. Smith - Okay, granted, I've only read the first book in the series.  But from the first time we encounter Damon, he seems to be aiming to win the title of World's Biggest Jerk.  I have to wonder what, exactly, is wrong with this guy.
4. Daniel from Bridget Jones's Diary by Helen Fielding - This guy makes enemies because he can't keep it in his pants.  Cheating bastard.  Enough said.
3. Heathcliff from Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë - I don't know...  Isn't everybody in this book a jerk?
2. Mr. Collins from Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen - I can't stand this guy.  Not because he's particularly mean or nasty, but because he's such an utter bore.  Seriously... who cares how many chimneys a house has?
1. God from the Old Testament by some guys in the desert - Love Him or hate Him, you've got to admit, the way this guy is written about in the Old Testament doesn't exactly do much to recommend Him.  Even by conservative estimates, He's killed millions.  It's kind of hard to top that in terms of jerkiness... so I'm afraid He has to take the top spot.


  1. Fantastic List. I was very surprised to see Jacob on your list. I didn't see the whole kiss thing like that. Interesting. Thanks for sharing.

  2. Your last entry cracked me up!
    Are we following each other yet? I don't think so.
    I'll go first!

  3. I freakin' love this. LOVE IT. Like will commit it to memory

  4. LOL! Your descriptions had me laughing and I have to say, I agree with you on most of them.

  5. God is an interesting answer. I definitely see your point. Lyrics from a song by David Bazan comes to mind: When Job asked you a question / You responded, "Who are you?" / to challenge your creator / well, if that one part is true / it makes you sound defense / like you had not through it through / enough to have an answer / or you might have bit off more than you could chew