Review - Spellbinder (DNF)

Spellbinder (Spellbinder #1)
by Helen Stringer
Date: 2009
Publisher: Feiwel & Friends
Reading level: MG
Book type: prose novel
Pages: 384
Format: hardcover
Source: Indigo

Belladonna Johnson can see ghosts. It’s a trait she’s inherited from her mother’s side of the family, like blue eyes or straight hair. And it’s a trait she could do without, because what twelve-year-old wants to be caught talking to someone invisible?

It is convenient, though, after Belladonna’s parents are killed in a car accident. They can live with her the same as always, watching the same old TV shows in their same old house. Nothing has changed... until everything changes.

One night, with no warning, they vanish into thin air—along with every other ghost in the world. It’s what some people think ghosts are supposed to do, but Belladonna knows it’s all wrong. They may not be living, but they’re not supposed to be gone.

With the help of her classmate Steve, a master of sneaking and spying, Belladonna is left to uncover what’s become of the spirits and to navigate a whole world her parents have kept well-hidden. If she can’t find her way, she’ll lose them again—this time for good.

(synopsis from Goodreads)

I honestly didn't think that any book could be worse than The Explosionist... but I was so very, very wrong. I must have a knack for picking utter crap.

Spellbinder is about a girl named Belladonna Johnson. Her parents died in a car accident, but it's not so bad because Belladonna has a talent: she can see ghosts. So her family life is pretty much as it was before... except that now her parents can do things like poke their heads through the living room wall. But then one day all the ghosts in the world disappear. It's up to Belladonna and her friend Steve to discover what happened to all the ghosts... or, this time, Belladonna could lose her parents forever.

That really doesn't sound so bad, does it? The premise itself isn't bad. The writing, on the other hand, was absolutely abysmal. The author does not know how to write dialogue. And I'm not talking about stylistic issues here. I'm talking about the nuts-and-bolts punctuation and grammar of dialogue that you're supposed to learn in elementary school. As I read the book, I got angrier and angrier. This sort of thing should just not be published! Scarier still is the fact that this is a middle-grade book. If this is how we're teaching kids about the English language, it's no wonder so many of them can barely construct a sentence. Here are some particularly heinous examples:

"It's not allowed," Aya glanced back nervously.
page 97

Dr. Ashe nodded and managed a smile, "Quite so."
page 138

No, no, no! Ms. Stringer, are you allergic to the humble period? Those sentences are just plain wrong. Added to the weird spliced dialogue were speech attributions that just didn't make any sense:

"Hello, darling," beamed her mother.
page 19

"Oh, well," shrugged Steve.
page 100

Is Belladonna's mother telepathic? Can Steve's shoulders actually emit sound and talk? If so, I might be willing to let those go. But there's nothing in the book to suggest telepathic mothers or talking shoulders, so I'm going to label it as a mistake. What on earth is wrong with the words "said" or "asked"?

And the worst part of all of this is that, in the back of the book, the editors are proudly named. There's nothing to be proud of here. Spellbinder was so badly written that I'm probably going to avoid reading any other books by this publisher because it's obvious that even the editors don't have a clear understanding of the English language.

I got almost halfway through, struggling against the stinking prose and questionable actions of the main character. (Honestly. She walks out into traffic and a car nearly hits her. But it hits a cyclist instead before crashing into a concrete barrier. Instead of hanging around to give a witness statement to the police, Belladonna walks away with her friend to break into the school. Yeah, there's a responsible thing to be teaching kids.) Then I got bronchitis, and though I felt like curling up in bed and reading a book, I just couldn't bring myself to read any more of this one. I want books to bring me comfort when I'm sick... not make me feel even more ill. So I gave up. Life's too short for bad books.

The ratings below are for what I did read. Yes, that's a negative 2 for the writing. I'm not going to be limited to a zero when something's this bad.

Plot: 1/5
Characters: 1/5
Pace: 0/5
Writing: -2/5
Originality: 2/5

Overall: 0.4 out of 5
(so bad it killed the ladybug!)

Share-A-Book Saturday (24)

This is something I found over on Just Another Book Addict =), and I thought I'd do my own. There are so many great books out there that get overlooked (especially if they've been out for a while)!

Every Saturday, you share (recommend) a book, preferably one that you haven't reviewed yet. It's just a way to get other books out into the blogging world. This is NOT a review.

Today I'm going to recommend The Princess Bride by William Goldman.

William Goldman’s beloved novel has sold over one million copies. A movie, released twenty years ago, perfectly captured the spirit of the book and has introduced new fans to its pages ever since. In 1941 a young boy lies bedridden from pneumonia. His perpetually disheveled and unattractive father, an immigrant from Florin with terribly broken English, shuffles into his bedroom carrying a book. The boy wants to know if it has any sports. His father says, "Fencing. Fighting. Torture. Poison. True love. Hate. Revenge. Giants. Hunters. Bad men. Good men. Beautifulest ladies. Snakes. Spiders. Beasts of all natures and descriptions. Pain. Death. Brave men. Coward men. Strongest men. Chases. Escapes. Lies. Truths. Passions. Miracles." And the little boy, though he doesn’t know it, is about to change forever. As Goldman says, "What happened was just this. I got hooked on the story." And coming generations of readers will, too.

When I first saw the movie back in the 1980s (has it really been that long?), I fell in love with the story. I didn't know then that it was actually based on a book that's just as funny and just as wonderful. When I finally read it years later, I wished I had gotten around to it sooner. Like The Neverending Story, a book that was also made into a fairly decent movie, The Princess Bride is one of those books you just need to read for yourself.

"Fencing. Fighting. Torture. Poison. True love. Hate. Revenge. Giants. Hunters. Bad men. Good men. Beautifulest ladies. Snakes. Spiders. Beasts of all natures and descriptions. Pain. Death. Brave men. Coward men. Strongest men. Chases. Escapes. Lies. Truths. Passions. Miracles."

What's not to like?

Saturday Steals (1)

Saturday Steals is a meme hosted at Archives of Our Lives.

It seems that a lot of the books I've bought lately have been steals. None of the really spectacular deals I've gotten have been in the past week (like the 30-dollar hardcover I once got for 60 cents... best deal ever!). But I did go to the bookstore this week and I found one book in the sale section that looked good (it was buy 2 get 1 free, but I tried to show a little restraint). I got:

Voices
by Ursula K. Le Guin
Hardcover

List price: $22.95. I paid: $4.31.

Yeah... I'd say that's a steal!

(I found out later that it's the second book in a series, but apparently this book can stand on its own. The premise looks really interesting. I can't wait to read it!)

Musing Mondays (17)

Musing Mondays is hosted by Rebecca at Just One More Page...

Do you have a favourite picture book, either from your own childhood, or reading to your children?

It's funny, but I don't really think I have just one favourite. Of course, there were picture books that I loved when I was a kid. I remember wanting to get Mr. Rabbit and the Lovely Present out of the library all the time (though I can't imagine why... looking at the book now, I'm surprised that Mr. Rabbit didn't give me nightmares!).

I remember having favourite authors and illustrators more than one favourite book. I remember liking the artwork of Cindy Szekeres and Michael Hague; any books illustrated by them were so much fun to look at. Robert Munsch books were big favourites in our household. And Mary Rayner's books about the pig family were checked out of the library quite often, too (they are so funny; I'd love to give them as gifts but, sadly, they are all out of print).

In My Mailbox (12)

I think I actually ordered this bunch of books (online) before I went to the bookstore last week. In any case, I've got more books! I didn't realize that Before I Fall and Storm Glass were so thick. Yikes. I think that I'm probably set for books for the rest of the year!

Anyway, here's what was in my mailbox (literally):

Before I Fall
by Lauren Oliver

What if you had only one day to live? What would you do? Who would you kiss? And how far would you go to save your own life?

Samantha Kingston has it all: the world's most crush-worthy boyfriend, three amazing best friends, and first pick of everything at Thomas Jefferson High—from the best table in the cafeteria to the choicest parking spot. Friday, February 12, should be just another day in her charmed life.

Instead, it turns out to be her last.

Then she gets a second chance. Seven chances, in fact. Reliving her last day during one miraculous week, she will untangle the mystery surrounding her death—and discover the true value of everything she is in danger of losing.

Dream Spinner
by Bonnie Dobkin

Disfigured by a car accident that also killed her dad, Jori has been transformed from a popular high school student into a bitter loner. Fatherless, isolated, and betrayed by her best friend, Jori is angry at the world. And now her sister Lisa has disappeared, unable to cope with the changes in her family. Walking home from school one day, Jori stumbles upon a strange house and meets Professor DePris, who shows her a living tapestry woven from dreams. Distrustful of the eccentric old man and the telepathic spider who weaves for him, she resists entering the dream tapestry until she realizes her sister is trapped inside. It’s up to Jori to enter the tapestry and rescue Lisa from the monstrous old man who is feasting on her fantasies. But how can Jori convince Lisa to leave this fantastic, yet dangerous, world where anything—even reuniting with their father—is possible?

Evil?
by Timothy Carter

Book of Stuart, Chapter 1:10.

10 And, yea verily, Stuart did commit the Sin of Onan in the shower. And this was witnessed by his own brother who did cry out unto their mother. And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth.
11 And the townspeople rose up against him and all Onaners, calling upon one another to tear the youthful sinners limb from unclean limb. And there was much pants wetting.
12 And lo, Stuart did join forces with the demon, Fon Pyre, and together they did set forth to discover the cause of the town's trouble.
13 And, hark! A pair of fallen angels would plant seeds of hatred unto the townspeople. And on the seventh day, Stuart did vow to rip the fallen angels a new one and layeth upon them an epic smacketh-down.

Storm Glass
by Maria V. Snyder

As a glassmaker and a magician-in-training, Opal Cowen understands trial by fire. Now it's time to test her mettle. Someone has sabotaged the Stormdancer clan's glass orbs, killing their most powerful magicians. The Stormdancers—particularly the mysterious and mercurial Kade—require Opal's unique talents to prevent it happening again. But when the mission goes awry, Opal must tap in to a new kind of magic as stunningly potent as it is frightening. And the further she delves into the intrigue behind the glass and magic, the more distorted things appear. With lives hanging in the balance—including her own—Opal must control powers she hadn't known she possessed…powers that might lead to disaster beyond anything she's ever known.


Yes! I'm finally going to start the Glass series. I keep hearing good things about it. And I've been waiting for Before I Fall for ages. The other two... well, they just looked interesting. And Evil? looks like it could be pretty funny.



What was in your "mailbox" this week?



In My Mailbox was started by Kristi of The Story Siren.

Share-A-Book Saturday (23)

This is something I found over on Just Another Book Addict =), and I thought I'd do my own. There are so many great books out there that get overlooked (especially if they've been out for a while)!

Every Saturday, you share (recommend) a book, preferably one that you haven't reviewed yet. It's just a way to get other books out into the blogging world. This is NOT a review.

Today I'm going to recommend Tom's Midnight Garden by Philippa Pearce.

Tom is furious. His brother, Peter, has measles, so now Tom is being shipped off to stay with Aunt Gwen and Uncle Alan in their boring old apartment. There'll be nothing to do there and no one to play with. Tom just counts the days till he can return home to Peter.

Then one night the landlady's antique grandfather clock strikes thirteen times, leading Tom to a wonderful, magical discovery and marking the beginning of a secret that's almost too amazing to be true. But it is true, and in the new world that Tom discovers is a special friend named Hatty and more than a summer's worth of adventure for both of them. Now Tom wishes he could stay with his relatives and Hatty -- forever...

I read this charming story years ago when I was on a bit of a classics kick. It's a newer classic (written in the 1950s), but it would probably still appeal to people who like the really old stuff.

England has produced some great children's authors in the last 100 years or so who wrote books that are still being enjoyed today. And those books often have a flavour that is so very... well, English. Tom's Midnight Garden is one of those. As a fantasy, it reminds me a little bit of Coraline or Marianne Dreams... but without the creepiness factor. There's just something intriguing and enchanting about a clock that strikes thirteen and opens a doorway into the past...

Word verification Balderdash (26)

This fun meme was started by Sheila over at One Persons Journey through a world of Books, and is now hosted by Ryan G of Wordsmithonia.

This is the weekly meme where anyone who wishes to play along can take those crazy word verifications they have had over the past week and apply a fake definition to them (much like how you play the board game Balderdash).

Here are this week's words:

ickletat - noun - a slang term for a cute kitten, usually spoken in a singsong baby voice

trairm - noun - an elevated train, developed in the 1890s, that glided on a cushion of air; this invention was abandoned after a series of of accidents that resulted from the train veering off the tracks during windstorms

opallaru - noun - a quadrupedal mammal that lives in the grasslands of Africa; opallaru have been hunted almost to extinction by poachers who are after their unique, iridescent horns

singst - verb - an archaic and obsolete conjugation of the verb "sing"

SureU - noun - an institute of higher learning that, rather than teaching facts, teaches its students to believe in their own opinions... no matter how preposterous they might be; SureU, fittingly, offers online degree programs

trobbeg - noun - a mythical creature that lives in ditches along the sides of roadways and accosts passersby with pleas for money; trobbegs are similar in appearance to trolls, but have much poorer money management skills (hence their need to beg)

Review - The Explosionist

The Explosionist (Dynamite #1)
by Jenny Davidson
Date: 2008
Publisher: HarperTeen
Reading level: YA
Book type: prose novel
Pages: 464
Format: hardcover
Source: Indigo

The Explosionist is the story of a 15-year-old girl growing up in an alternate version of 1930s Edinburgh. There, the legacy of Napoleon's victory a century earlier at Waterloo is a standoff between a totalitarian Federation of European States and a group of independent northern countries called the New Hanseatic League. This world is preoccupied with technology (everything from electric cookers to high explosives) but also with spiritualism, a movement our world largely abandoned in the early 20th Century; Sigmund Freud is a radio talk-show crank, cars run on hydrogen and the most prominent scientists experiment with new ways of contacting the dead.

(synopsis from Goodreads)

I'm not quite sure how to go about reviewing this book. It was one of the worst books I've ever read, with one of the most awful heroines I've ever had the displeasure of encountering. I'm completely baffled by the positive reviews on Amazon.com, and I have no idea how or why it was picked up by a major publisher (Harper Collins).

Note: This review does contain spoilers. It was impossible to talk about what I didn't like without including them.

Basically, The Explosionist takes place in an alternate timeline in Scotland in 1938. The Battle of Waterloo had the opposite outcome, England was absorbed into mainland Europe, and Scotland became an isolated country with a successful munitions industry. Sophie Hunter, an orphan who lives with her Spiritualist great aunt in Edinburgh, must solve a mystery about the murder of a medium... before the government's IRYLNS program can get its hands on her and turn her into a man-serving drone.

My problems with this book were many. First, there were the characters. I could not identify with any of them. As the book went on, I kept shaking my head, wondering if the author had even been around other people, since she didn't seem to know how people were supposed to act. I think the author thought that 1938 was supposed to be a very sexist time for women. But the way she had her characters act often made no sense. There was a scene where Sophie was on the phone with her friend, Mikael, and Mikael made a comment about wanting to protect her from seeing something grisly because she was a girl. After Sophie hung up the phone, she sank to the floor and cried. Then the next time she saw Mikael, she apologized to him! I still can't figure out what she was apologizing for. Being a girl? I don't know.

Sophie was not the most consistent character. She was also rather dumb. She suffers from SNS to a horrible degree. But the author also withheld information from the reader... and that angered me far more. In the beginning of the book, Sophie has a crush on her chemistry teacher. Other than the fact that he has fair hair, we're not really told what he looks like. Later in the book, Sophie realizes that it's not her chemistry teacher she's in love with, but Mikael... who happens to be the teacher's younger brother. They apparently look so much alike that Sophie can transfer her affections from one to the other; but we're never told what Mikael looks like, so we don't have the opportunity to put the pieces together for ourselves. I felt cheated at that point, as if the author was trying to be mysterious and clever. But I guess if Mikael had been described, the reader might've been able to figure out the connection, and Sophie would have looked even dumber for not seeing it sooner. Sophie was also, ultimately, selfish. Sacrificing oneself is a lot to ask of a 15-year-old girl, but it's what I would have expected here. After all that Sophie went through to get evidence of what was going on at IRYLNS, the fact that she decided not to tell anyone (and basically allow her friends to be lobotomized to serve men) made no sense. If you find evidence of a whole generation of girls being brain damaged, do you really keep it a secret because one of them told you to? Really?

That wasn't the worst of it, though. Sophie was just not written as a 15-year-old girl. At one point in the story, Sophie thought that someone was speaking to her as if she was "a mentally deficient ten-year-old". My first thought when I read that line was, "If you don't want to be treated like a mentally deficient ten-year-old, then stop acting like one!" All of Sophie's friends, as well, acted like little children, basically throwing hissy fits when something didn't go their way. Jean, in particular, came off as terribly immature. I found it difficult to believe that these girls were old enough to drive, a year away from finishing their schooling, and almost old enough to marry.

As for the story itself, I did like the alternate timeline idea. I thought it was great that Scotland powered its cars with fuel cells (plausible, since they didn't have much access to oil and gas and would have had to, out of sheer necessity, come up with an alternate energy source). The fact that Spiritualism was a large part of this society was interesting, too. But the story, at times, got bogged down with way too many facts and implausibilities. The information dump near the end about the manufacture of nitroglycerin and dynamite read like the perseverating ramblings of someone obsessed with explosives. It's nice to have some details, but it is possible to go overboard.

I was also not impressed with the writing. It started out okay (aside from way too much telling and not enough showing) but, gradually, run-on sentences started to creep in. I think I have a fairly decent vocabulary, but I was constantly having to write down words to look up later (too much thesaurus use, perhaps?). The author also seemed to like the word "scruple", using it a number of times (both as a noun and as a verb). And some of the writing was just plain odd. I remember this simile clearly, because it was obviously mixed-up:

Mikael let himself be dragged into the storefront, where the smell of hot fat enveloped them like a cloak of invisibility.

Unless we're talking about a case of synesthesia, I don't see how a smell can be compared with invisibility.

Eventually, this dragged-out dystopian murder mystery ended, but with little resolution. It took more than 450 pages to "solve" the mystery, even though the actual whodunnit was solved about halfway through. This book is obviously leading to a sequel (which I have no intention of reading).

The only really good thing that I can say about this book is that the cover is lovely (even though the girl looks nothing like Sophie), and that I got it at a huge discount. Still, knowing what I know now, I wouldn't pay $1.67 to read it. It was that bad.

Plot: 1/5
Characters: 0/5
Pace: 1/5
Writing: 1/5
Originality: 3/5

Overall: 1.2 out of 5

In My Mailbox (11)

Curse you, Indigo, and your lovely sales! My bank account does not thank you.

This week I picked up four books. Three of them are middle-grade reads; I need to get going on that In The Middle Reading Challenge. Here's what I got:

The Forest of Hands and Teeth
by Carrie Ryan

In Mary's world there are simple truths. The Sisterhood always knows best. The Guardians will protect and serve. The Unconsecrated will never relent. And you must always mind the fence that surrounds the village; the fence that protects the village from the Forest of Hands and Teeth. But, slowly, Mary’s truths are failing her. She’s learning things she never wanted to know about the Sisterhood and its secrets, and the Guardians and their power, and about the Unconsecrated and their relentlessness. When the fence is breached and her world is thrown into chaos, she must choose between her village and her future—between the one she loves and the one who loves her. And she must face the truth about the Forest of Hands and Teeth. Could there be life outside a world surrounded in so much death?

Peter and the Starcatchers
by Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson

Don't even think of starting this book unless you're sitting in a comfortable chair and have lots of time. A fast-paced, impossible-to-put-down adventure awaits as the young orphan Peter and his mates are dispatched to an island ruled by the evil King Zarboff. They set sail aboard the Never Land, a ship carrying a precious and mysterious trunk in its cargo hold -- and the journey quickly becomes fraught with excitement and danger. Discover richly developed characters in the sweet but sophisticated Molly, the scary but familiar Black Stache, and the fearless Peter. Treacherous battles with pirates, foreboding thunderstorms at sea, and evocative writing immerse the reader in a story that slowly and finally reveals the secrets and mysteries of the beloved Peter Pan.

The Faerie Door
by B. E. Maxwell

Long ago the Faerie Queen created portals between our world and hers, so that children could summon help from faeries whenever the need arose. But a wicked entity called the Shadow Knight is endeavoring to control the doors between the two worlds, and only evil can get through. It falls to two imaginative eleven-year-olds—Victoria Deveny, from 1890 Britain, and Elliot Good, from 1966 America—to thwart his plan.

The Faerie Queen dispatches the youths on separate quests to retrieve orbs of power that will ultimately defeat the Shadow Knight. Their bravery and friendship are tested as the children travel to fantastic realms and face life-threatening dangers—from dragons to flying pirate ships to a wicked sorceress queen—before they're reunited to confront the dreaded Shadow Knight.

Spellbinder
by Helen Stringer

Belladonna Johnson can see ghosts. It’s a trait she’s inherited from her mother’s side of the family, like blue eyes or straight hair. And it’s a trait she could do without, because what twelve-year-old wants to be caught talking to someone invisible?

It is convenient, though, after Belladonna’s parents are killed in a car accident. They can live with her the same as always, watching the same old TV shows in their same old house. Nothing has changed . . . until everything changes.

One night, with no warning, they vanish into thin air—along with every other ghost in the world. It’s what some people think ghosts are supposed to do, but Belladonna knows it’s all wrong. They may not be living, but they’re not supposed to be gone.

With the help of her classmate Steve, a master of sneaking and spying, Belladonna is left to uncover what’s become of the spirits and to navigate a whole world her parents have kept well-hidden. If she can’t find her way, she’ll lose them again—this time for good.


I hadn't heard of The Faerie Door or Spellbinder... but they both sound rather good. I think I might read one of them next. I'm getting a little annoyed with YA fiction at the moment (or maybe it's just the awful book I'm reading at the moment that's colouring my judgment).



What was in your "mailbox" this week?



In My Mailbox was started by Kristi of The Story Siren.

Share-A-Book Saturday (22)

This is something I found over on Just Another Book Addict =), and I thought I'd do my own. There are so many great books out there that get overlooked (especially if they've been out for a while)!

Every Saturday, you share (recommend) a book, preferably one that you haven't reviewed yet. It's just a way to get other books out into the blogging world. This is NOT a review.

Today I'm going to recommend I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith.

I Capture the Castle tells the story of seventeen-year-old Cassandra and her family, who live in not-so-genteel poverty in a ramshackle old English castle. Here she strives, over six turbulent months, to hone her writing skills. She fills three notebooks with sharply funny yet poignant entries. Her journals candidly chronicle the great changes that take place within the castle's walls, and her own first descent into love. By the time she pens her final entry, she has "captured the castle"--and the heart of the reader--in one of literature's most enchanting entertainments.

I don't think I've ever identified with a narrator more than when I read I Capture the Castle years ago. It certainly wasn't Cassandra's circumstances that I identified with. Perhaps it was her personality. In any case, I fell in love with this book. It will always have a place on my list of favourites.

Yes, there was a movie made a few years ago. It's probably good in its own right... as long as you haven't read the book. There are just so many more wonderful little things in the book that never made it into the film, things that really shaped the characters and their actions.

Though this novel is over 60 years old, the coming-of-age story is a classic... and, hopefully, will remain so for generations to come.

Word verification Balderdash (25)

This fun meme was started by Sheila over at One Persons Journey through a world of Books, and is now hosted by Ryan G of Wordsmithonia.

This is the weekly meme where anyone who wishes to play along can take those crazy word verifications they have had over the past week and apply a fake definition to them (much like how you play the board game Balderdash).

Here are this week's words:

biabull - noun - a genetically engineered creature that resembles a bovine, but that has two of everything (two heads, two stomachs, two tails, etc.); biabulls are now nearly extinct, due to the fact that they have only two legs and can not properly run away from predators

cosis - verb - to share the duty of being a sister with another girl; cosissing is more common in large families; see also cogran

egewri - noun - the scribbles often seen along the margins of pages in library books; most egewri seems to have little relevance to the adjacent printed text

pyxwu - noun - the seldom-seen mating ritual of wood pixies

raccoi - noun - a type of koi that is especially coveted for backyard ponds as it is more resistant to raccoon attacks

Tuclep - noun - a rapper, known for his obsession with mint juleps, who died in a suspicious incident involving a water pistol, a live bunny, and a wheel of Havarti cheese