Thursday, December 6, 2018

Review - Afterlife

Afterlife
by Marcus Sakey
Date: 2017
Publisher: Thomas & Mercer
Reading level: A
Book type: prose novel
Pages: 320
Format: e-book
Source: Amazon.ca

Between life and death lies an epic war, a relentless manhunt through two worlds… and an unforgettable love story.

The last thing FBI agent Will Brody remembers is the explosion — a thousand shards of glass surfing a lethal shock wave. He wakes without a scratch. The building is in ruins. His team is gone. Outside, Chicago is dark. Cars lie abandoned. No planes cross the sky. He’s relieved to spot other people — until he sees they’re carrying machetes.

Welcome to the afterlife.

Claire McCoy stands over the body of Will Brody. As head of an FBI task force, she hasn’t had a decent night’s sleep in weeks. A terrorist has claimed eighteen lives and thrown the nation into panic. Against this horror, something reckless and beautiful happened. She fell in love… with Will Brody. But the line between life and death is narrower than any of us suspect — and all that matters to Will and Claire is getting back to each other.

From the author of the million-copy bestselling Brilliance Trilogy comes a mind-bending thriller that explores our most haunting and fundamental question: What if death is just the beginning?

(synopsis from Goodreads)

WARNING: Major Spoilers! To read this review with the spoilers hidden, check it out on Goodreads.

I really struggled with this one. For the first quarter or so, I thought I was going to like this book. But, as time went on, the writing and editing fell apart, and reading became more of a slog. There are so many plot holes in the story, so many things that don't make sense (and that aren't satisfactorily explained), that the whole thing suffers. It doesn't help that the characters are flat, existing as collections of basic traits (if that). I got tired of the book telling me what kind of people these were, or how their relationships were supposed to be. Brody and Claire, as the star couple of this story, should've had way more chemistry than they actually did. Them continually musing that they're so in love that they must've been together before didn't really do much to develop their relationship.

My main problem with this book, however, is that it seems confused about its own world-building. In some parts, it seems like a materialist manifesto. Everything that comes after death is informed by life. All energy comes from the physical world. (Which is pretty much the opposite of most spiritual traditions, so I wasn't sure where the author was going with this.) But then Brody and Claire keep making statements that hint at reincarnation and, in fact, at the end, there seems to be something like that going on. (Although, that concept is muddled there, too, since the last scene takes place ten years later, and Brody and Claire have apparently come back as... Brody and Claire.) I'm left with the impression that this book was written by an atheist who doesn't really understand the concepts of the afterlife and reincarnation at all. Even if we assume reincarnation is real--according to this book and the rules it's set out--you basically have to go through hell to get there. The echo is populated by normal dead people and psychopathic killers who have become quasi-gods. There are no checks and balances, so it's not even a world of black-and-white contrasts. It's more of a black-and-grey world, and I found it extremely depressing. Basically, you can be killed in the physical world, then killed again in the echo... and there are layers and layers of echoes, so the process could go on for a while. To what end? What's the purpose of this perpetual victimization? This is never explained. Evil is allowed to grow unchecked, and everyone else simply has to suffer through it.

The writing itself is a mixed bag. In the beginning, it isn't too bad. But this book seems like so many others I've read, where the editor just throws in the towel after the opening act. When characters started shrugging their speech at around the 1/4 mark, I started to lose hope. The amount of sentence fragments is ridiculous. And I'm not impressed with the way the author writes his female characters. Brody is constantly talking about how amazing and efficient and smart and whatever Claire is; it's like the author is trying way too hard to convince the reader that he's a feminist or something. But then he has Claire go and describe another woman solely with her breast size. (That's not the first thing most women would think to mention.) There's a lot of stuff that relies on the reader's knowledge of Chicago, like landmarks and street names; having never been there, it was mostly meaningless to me. (And I'm still trying to figure out what the author meant when he said one of the characters had a "Chicago build".) And then there are the plot holes. People apparently don't age or get sick in the echo... but they can get injured and require Tylenol. They can raid fridges and eat food cold (because the food magically appears in the fridge as an echo from the physical world), but they can't cook anything because there's no fire and the stoves don't work. The fridges work, but not the stoves? Okay... but if you really wanted something hot, couldn't you raid a room-service tray or a restaurant table and steal that echoed hot food?

This book basically blew past what was outlined in the synopsis at the halfway mark, so I had no idea what I was going to get for the rest of it. Had I known it was going to be a depressing, muddled vision of the afterlife riddled with plot holes and one-dimensional characters, I probably wouldn't have bothered starting this one in the first place. There is a glimmer of a good idea here, but it turned out to be kind of a mess.

Premise: 2/5
Plot: 2/5
Characters: 2/5
Pace: 2/5
Writing: 2/5
Editing: 2/5
Originality: 3/5
Enjoyment: 1/5

Overall Rating: 2 out of 5 ladybugs

Wednesday, December 5, 2018

Review - Gingerbread Christmas

Gingerbread Christmas (Jan Brett's Gingerbread)
by Jan Brett
Date: 2016
Publisher: G.P. Putnam's Sons Books for Young Readers
Reading level: C
Book type: picture book
Pages: 32
Format: e-book
Source: library

Jan Brett’s beloved character the Gingerbread Baby returns in a fun-filled Christmas caper!

Gingerbread Baby and his friend, Matti, take his gingerbread band to the Christmas Festival where they are a hit until the aroma of gingerbread reaches the children, signaling that it is time to run away. Clever Matti uses snow to disguise the gingerbread instruments while Gingerbread Baby leads the audience on a merry chase to the smartest hiding place ever--a giant Christmas tree.

(synopsis from Goodreads)

Maybe I'm just too old for books about sentient baked goods.

I think this book will probably have more appeal to fans of the series. This is the first one I've read, so I was a bit lost. Who is this Matti kid, and how can he make magical gingerbread? That part of the book seems to rely on knowledge of previous volumes.

The story didn't impress me much. Or, rather, the characters didn't impress me much. The villagers are so stupid! When they see magical gingerbread instruments playing music, what's their first thought? Well, you'd think it might be something like, "Wow! Magic gingerbread!" Alas, it's more like, "Let's eat!" (Perhaps the villagers have seen Matti's magical baked goods before, so it's not a big deal. Again, I felt like I was missing something.) At the end, the Gingerbread Baby has to run away and hide in a giant Christmas tree lest he be eaten. I read this as an e-book, but I think the page with the Christmas tree actually folds out (that's what it looked like, anyway). I could just make out the Gingerbread Baby in his very detailed hiding place. And that brings me to my favourite part of the book: the illustrations. They were so charming, detailed and fairly realistic (at least where the people and animals were concerned). There's a lot to look at on each page, since there's gingerbread decoration surrounding each two-page spread.

I think I might've liked this one better if I was more familiar with the characters and the overall premise. But the illustrations are great. This would be a nice Christmas book for fans of Brett's work, especially if they've read the rest of this series.

Premise: 2/5
Meter: n/a
Writing: 3/5
Illustrations: 4/5
Originality: 3/5

Enjoyment: 2/5

Overall: 2.67 out of 5

Review - Deck the Walls

Deck the Walls
by Erin Dealey
illustrated by Nick Ward
Date: 2013
Publisher: Sleeping Bear Press
Reading level: C
Book type: picture book
Pages: 32
Format: e-book
Source: library

Deck the halls with boughs of holly, Fa la la la la la la la la. How wonderful the old carol sounds. A vision of warm family gatherings peacefully celebrating the holiday season comes to mind. But wait, this doesn’t sound like a peaceful family get-together. What is happening here? Deck the walls with mashed potatoes! Fa la la la la la la la la. Make a snowman with tomatoes. Fa la la la la la la la la. Author Erin Dealey has taken the old holiday classic and turned it on its head. In her riotous, raucous rendition of a family meal gone hilariously awry, you’ll find food hockey, vegetable sculptures, crashing dishes, and grown-ups wondering what has gone wrong. From “Feed the dog our peas and carrots” to “Food tastes better when you wear it,” readers young and old will never forget this new take on an old holiday carol!

(synopsis from Goodreads)

I didn't expect to like this book as much as I did. Are the kids misbehaving? Yes. But, to be fair, it's Christmas and they're probably full of sugar and adrenaline. Some of the kids' antics actually reminded me of past holiday celebrations with my own cousins, including one that ended with a cry of, "Grandma! There's ketchup on the curtains!"

The text is based on the traditional song "Deck the Halls", but most of the words have been changed to reflect a modern, Western family Christmas celebration. The kids play with their food and make messes, complain about their boring aunts and uncles, and spend time outside, always grateful that they have each other.

The illustrations are quite cute. There's plenty of humour and personality in the characters.

Sheet music for the original song and a recipe for sugar cookies are included at the back of the book.

I read this as an e-book, and from the very beginning, there were problems with formatting the text for the "fa la la" bits; there were never enough syllables, and on some pages the words were scattered willy-nilly. These problems also extended to the recipe, rendering it useless, as there appeared to be chunks of instructions missing. I'm not going to take any points off for that, because it's probably not an issue with other formats. Just be aware of this if you decide to go for the e-book edition.

Quotable moment:

Olive hockey with the cousins.
Fa la la la la
la la la la


Premise: 4/5
Meter: 4/5
Writing: 4/5
Illustrations: 4/5
Originality: 3/5

Enjoyment: 4/5

Overall: 3.86 out of 5

Review - Jingle Bells

Jingle Bells
by James Pierpont
illustrated by Jade Goegebuer
Date: 2018
Publisher: Xist Publishing
Reading level: C
Book type: picture book
Pages: 30
Format: e-book
Source: NetGalley

Take a Ride in a One Horse Open Sleigh

The classic Christmas carol comes to life in this beautifully illustrated edition of Jingle Bells. Originally written in 1857 for the Thanksgiving season, Jingle Bells has become a beloved Christmas song sung by young and old alike. In this edition, delicate watercolor images are paired with the text to bring the delight of the holiday season to young readers.

(synopsis from Goodreads)

This is a completely unnecessary book that combines a dated song with ugly illustrations. I'm sorry if that sounds harsh, but I thought the pictures were hideous and kind of creepy. When you're dealing with subject matter that's so familiar, the illustrations had better be spectacular... or readers are just going to move on to the next (better) book.

It seems weird to be critiquing a song from 1857, but I think it needs to be pointed out that some of the verses are a bit dated. It's a little bit sexist, and there's one verse that shows appallingly bad behaviour (when the narrator falls on his back in the snow, another man passing by in his sleigh just laughs at him and continues without stopping to help). There's also a verse where the sleigh overturns, and this is shown in the illustrations... but there's no resolution, and we don't know how the couple managed to get their sleigh back on its runners to continue. Young readers are probably going to want to know. I sure did. And, finally, some of the verses make it clear that this is a song directed at heterosexual young men. You're apparently supposed to grab your girls and take them out for a sleigh ride.

I'm afraid I can't find much here to recommend. I'm sure this song has been illustrated before, and I'm fairly certain that any of those other versions would be more aesthetically pleasing than this one. Take one dated song, add some forgettable illustrations, and you get... this.

Thank you to NetGalley and Xist Publishing for providing a digital ARC.

Premise: 2/5
Meter: 3/5
Writing: 3/5
Illustrations: 1/5
Originality: 1/5

Enjoyment: 0/5

Overall: 1.43 out of 5

Review - A Dog Wearing Shoes

A Dog Wearing Shoes
by Sangmi Ko
Date: 2015
Publisher: Schwartz & Wade
Reading level: C
Book type: picture book
Pages: 40
Format: hardcover
Source: borrowed

When Mini finds a small moppet of a dog, with fluffy ears, no collar, and wearing yellow booties, she understandably wants to take it home. Despite Mom's insistence that the dog probably already has a family, Mini gets attached and is awfully proud of her new pal, who can sing, sit, and give both paws. But when the pup runs off one day at the park, Mini comes to understand how someone else out there might be missing the little guy too.

(synopsis from Goodreads)

My mom found a discounted hardcover of this book and picked it up, thinking it would make a great gift for someone. It hasn't found its new home yet, so I thought I'd have a quick read.

A Dog Wearing Shoes is absolutely adorable. Based on a true story about the author's niece, it shows a cute little lost dog wearing yellow shoes. Mini and her mom rescue it from a busy street, and of course Mini gets very attached to the dog.

The story is cute enough, but the illustrations are really what make this book work. The facial expressions on the humans are hilarious, and the facial expressions on the dogs (especially the one wearing yellow shoes) are priceless. There's so much joy emanating from the pages, and anyone who's had a dog will be able to relate to the exuberance and unfettered happiness shown by the motley crew of dogs. The pictures look like they're drawn in pencil or charcoal, with just tiny touches of colour (yellow for the dog's shoes, red for its leash).

My only complaint (and perhaps the reason why this book hasn't been gifted yet) is the unnecessary author's note in the back about how to adopt a dog. I think the fear is that a kid might get obsessed with getting a dog, even if their living circumstances aren't appropriate for one. This section is also heavily skewed toward Americans, and the same procedures might not apply elsewhere.

All that said, however, I can't fault the story itself. It's a charming one with hilariously joyful illustrations. It didn't hurt that the dog reminded me of one I had growing up. Although, our dog never wore cute yellow shoes...

Premise: 4/5
Meter: n/a
Writing: 4/5
Illustrations: 4/5
Originality: 4/5

Enjoyment: 5/5

Overall: 4.17 out of 5

Tuesday, December 4, 2018

Review - Don't Push the Button!: A Christmas Adventure

Don't Push the Button!: A Christmas Adventure
by Bill Cotter
Date: 2017
Publisher: Sourcebooks Jabberwocky
Reading level: C
Book type: picture book
Pages: 22
Format: e-book
Source: library

A holiday companion to Don't Push the Button!

It's almost Christmas and Santa is coming, so whatever you do-DON'T PUSH THE BUTTON!!

Well, maybe just once can't hurt...uh oh!

(synopsis from Goodreads)

This very simple book is exactly what the synopsis claims it to be: a holiday companion to Don't Push the Button! The premise is exactly the same, with Larry the monster asking kids to push the big red button... with varying results.

Of course, being a Christmas book, the changes that happen on the pages have a holiday theme. There are Christmas colours, candy-cane stripes, snow, elves... and a visit from Santa himself. And Santa has an important request for the reader...

I can't say that I love these books, and I do question how many times kids are going to go along with the shtick before the novelty wears off, but this one is still fun. Larry is endearing, and the interactive nature of these books ensures that kids will pay attention... at least once.

Premise: 3/5
Meter: n/a
Writing: 3/5
Illustrations: 3/5
Originality: 3/5

Enjoyment: 2/5

Overall: 2.83 out of 5

Review - Only You Can Save Christmas!

Only You Can Save Christmas!
by Adam Wallace
illustrated by Garth Bruner
Date: 2017
Publisher: Sourcebooks Jabberwocky
Reading level: C
Book type: picture book
Pages: 40
Format: e-book
Source: library

It's Christmas Eve, and Santa needs YOUR help in this fun, interactive picture book from the New York Times bestselling author of How to Catch an Elf!

It's Christmas Eve, and everything at the North Pole is going according to plan...until an elf discovers that Santa doesn't have a present ready for Mrs. Claus! Time is running out, and you're the only one who can help. But you'll have to honk, whistle, wiggle, and shake to make things turn out all right.

(synopsis from Goodreads)

This book has a similar premise to Bill Cotter's Don't Push the Button! series. But, in this case, the main character is a rather stupid elf who's obviously never heard the song "The Twelve Days of Christmas" and mistakes it for Santa's shopping list for his wife. That's only the beginning of the flawed premise. There's a big rush to collect all the presents because Santa's sleigh is leaving in fifteen minutes. Now, wait a minute; why do presents for Mrs. Claus need to be on Santa's sleigh in the first place? Doesn't she live at the North Pole with Santa? So he's just going to haul those gifts all over the world for no reason?

Some of the pictures are cute (I got a kick out of the calling--sorry, texting birds), but others are a bit disturbing. When Wink the elf couldn't find turtle doves, he found turtles instead, and rode them back to the sleigh while standing on their backs. They were both wearing metal collars with ropes, and one had its tongue hanging out like it was choking. I have no idea what that was doing in a children's book.

Finding the French hens, however, was what really turned me off. Wink tells us that "wee" means "yes" in French, so he asks kids to shout "wee wee wee wee wee wee" to find some French hens. I get that this is phonetic, but it's going to be insulting to French speakers to have that word equated with pee. (Plus, it basically makes the book suitable only for American children. French is widely spoken around the world, including here in Canada. I can tell you that if we, as kids, came across a book that told us that "wee" means "yes", we would've been the first to call it out. Use the correct spelling, or find a different way to find the French hens, please.)

Immediately after this, I read Don't Push the Button!: A Christmas Adventure, and while that story is much simpler, I thought it was the better of the two books (especially if you're already a fan of the Don't Push the Button! series). I'd recommend giving Only You Can Save Christmas! a pass.

Premise: 2/5
Meter: n/a
Writing: 1/5
Illustrations: 3/5
Originality: 2/5

Enjoyment: 1/5

Overall: 1.67 out of 5